The Hillbaley Ho Down & Extravaganza

Our Standards Are Very Low

When the Old and Decrepit Lose Their Minds

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Laurel Faye when she was able to feed herself. (circa 1997)

Laurel Faye Baley, affectionately known in the family circle as "Yoda", "Coog" or "the Evil One", has officially begun her downward spiral into old-age. The Ho Down was informed by a reliable source, who wishes to remain anonymous, that Laurel Faye had actually forgotten what day it was. When asked to comment on the incident, Laurel had forgotten what the question was and the story at press time was yet to be confirmed.

The alleged incident occurred late October when the reliable source, whom this paper will call Kathy Jessop (the Ho-Down has a strict policy of not respecting anonymity), phoned the poor decrepit soul for a golf date early in the week. The two agreed on 2:00 p.m. Friday for a tee time.

When Friday came, Kathy, realizing that her sister's state of mind has deteriorated rapidly (and having dealt with Laurel's shortcomings on a daily basis), phoned Laurel to remind her of the aforementioned tee time in the morning of said day. Laurel Faye graciously accepted the reminder and thanked her beloved sister for again taking the time to help her meet the every day challenges that elderly people must toil with; such as remembering that they have a golf date in 5 hours.

Laurel's fetish for drinking gallons of Caesars is believed to be the major cause for her condition

When Kathy arrived at the tee time Laurel Faye was nowhere to be seen. Concerned, she phoned Laurel's house and was, to say the least, surprised when Laurel answered. When Kathy asked Laurel if she knew what time it was, Laurel responded with the appropriate time and Kathy asked Laurel why she was not at the golf course. Laurel Faye replied, "because our golf date is on Friday silly!". Struggling with the dilemma of either bursting out with laughter or thinking maybe its time to give "The Home" a call and book a room, Kathy replied, "Coog! It IS Friday!". Laurel in a state of disbelief and confusion replied, "Really?". Kathy, used to these mental lapses, golfed alone and was heard muttering around the golf course, "I really have to get the number for The Home".

Should Laurel Faye be put in "The Home"? See the results of the poll here