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Two members of the Feline Mafioso Family were brutally attacked and murdered
last week in what has become one of this century's most vicious mob turf wars.
A third member was also brutally attacked, but survived.
In the early afternoon hours of October 23, Vinny “ Stone “ Cartuchi
(one of our new kittens) was found dead in the back yard of the Baley
household. The Baleys are known Feline sympathizers and it is guessed that the
Canine Crime Syndicate was behind the attack as they intended to send a message
to the Baleys and the Feline Family. Canine family member Crazy Cooter ("I
might be crazy but I sure ain't dumb") was originally under investigation
for the brutal attack, but the charges were soon dropped after the prosecution
could not gather sufficient evidence.
Adrian "The Golden Boy" Adonis
Just days later, Stephano "Shocks" Cartuchi (the second new kitten)
was found severely beaten in the front yard of the Baley Ranch. There were
several eye witnesses to this attack, but no one came forward. It is believed
that ring leader Adrian "The Golden Boy" Adonis of the canine crime
syndicate was the attacker.
Later that same day, Johnny "Hee-Hee" Carbone (the third new kitten)
was found severely beaten in the back yard of the Baley Ranch again with
several eye witnesses. Carbone was rushed to the Baley General Hospital (the
upstairs bathroom) and underwent intensive surgery (a warm bath and a lot of
TLC) and remained in critical condition for two days when he was found dead in
the intensive care ward (our linen closet).
The charges against Adorable Adrian Adonis were upgraded to two counts of murder
in the first degree and one count of aggravated assault in the first degree
(yes I do watch a lot of Law and Order) after two key eye witnesses came
forward to testify against Mr. Adonis (Cody and Colten). Those charges were
later dismissed and it is believed that the Canine Crime Syndicate has tampered
with the witnesses (i.e. put on their cute faces and let the kids rub their
bellies). Stephano "Shocks"Carbone was released from hospital and is
under the care of the Baley Family. He is not talking about the incident, but
was quoted as saying, "If I catch the !@#$%^&? who off-ed my two
brothers, I'm going to mess him up bad!". At press time, tensions were
running high and the local authorities fear that the turf war has just begun.